...blah blah blah.
So, it's August 28, and I'm watching computer models and five-day forecasts and NHC discussions as if I'm some sort of Gulf coast savant, knowing fully that I have no idea where this thing's headed, nor do I have any control over it. Of course, no one else does, either. All we can do is prepare.
That preparation, borne from getting Katrina'd (there's no polite way to put it), is a multi-point approach:
1. Hurricane kit. We have the Hurricane Kit For the Ages, including a respectable short wave radio, a half-dozen flashlights, rations (yes, rations), etc. We bought it from a company in California that specializes in earthquake supplies. It came in a five-gallon bucket. The bucket has a snap-on toilet seat. I'm not joking. Quite honestly, it's the Apocalypse Bucket, and I respect that.
2. Work has sent out an e-mail declaring a mandatory shutdown of our office effective COB tomorrow. Back up the data, take the important files, get everything off the floor, and roll out the polyethylene. It will be interesting to see if our (350,000 bpd) client shuts down as well.
3. The hot water heater and the oven at our house are gas-fired. Electricity: optional. Fridge shuts down? I have two huge bags of charcoal. The neighborhood will eat well.
4. Alabama does not require a license to purchase a firearm. There's a new Bass Pro Shops just down the road. I don't think it would ever get all "you loot, we shoot" here, but... I'm not saying, I'm just... saying.
Frankly, where we live isn't nearly as susceptible to flooding as our residence in New Orleans, so there's that. Our game plan: if it's not a 4 or 5, or unless there are some sort of other mitigating circumstances, we're staying.
On a more fun note, I feel I must relate a conversation that I had to witness today. I say "witness," because if I had "participated," my head would have "exploded." This confirms many of my venerable cousin's conclusions regarding (the curse of) Southern politics:
"You know, it scares me to death, but Obama just might win it."
"I wonder if the Muslims will test him."
"I know it's just, like, 10% of the Muslims who are all radical, but the others are still pretty traditional, what with the honor killings and all."
It got worse. I'm not kidding. Here's what I wanted to say:
"You know, if you think people who practice Islam have the market cornered on terrorist acts... well, maybe you should ask people who live in Northern Ireland how they feel about that. Or people who were in Atlanta in '96 during the Olympics. Or anyone who opened a special package from Ted Kaczynski. Or just about any resident from Oklahoma City."
The better argument, given where I am:
"You don't hate football, do you? Because when I was in high school, a (very kind and intelligent) fellow student was Mr. Alabama Football. He was also incredible at the game, and he was universally well liked. Oh, by the way, he practices Islam. So, if you think all Muslim people are bomb-toting terrorists, then Mr. Football was a terrorist, and football is evil. Therefore, the terrorists win."
My old high school is now a Muslim community center.
Q.E.D., redneck Alabama.
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2 comments:
Venerable? Somebody calling me old?
Oh. Never mind.
My advice to you is to go shotgun. 20 gauge ought to be sufficient, but don't bother with a pump unless you think you're going to be in conditions where you have to manually clear the chamber.
My other advice is to consider the many fine opportunities for employment and activity in Northern California. Please to overlook the high temp today.
I won't hesitate to say that my top reason under "#1 - Target Shooting" for owning a firearm is living on the gulf coast. Those are my only two reasons, anymore. I'm not pleased to own anything like that, these days, but I don't know that I could part with it.
But, really... shit. This is getting so very old. I love the sea, I love the south, but this event, this every single year event, is wearing on me. When we didn't live here, I never paid attention to this stuff so close, never refresh Wunderground so religiously. Storms didn't seem to be this frequent, this threatening, this involved. It was something you heard about on the news every now and then, saw swaying palms and some ass of a reporter on the beach sputtering as he tried to keep sand out of his mouth as he attempted to make topics like wave height and tropical storm force winds seem exciting.
I think all will be fine with this one, though. She's looking like a TX to me, although you're absolutely correct about none of us knowing exactly what is going to happen.
Jesus Christ, whatever you do, don't read through the comments on Dr. Masters' blog. You'll not encounter that kind of rabid idiocy anywhere else from a bunch of crazed armchair analysts and paranoids.
Keep us posted on what's up. I'm keeping a Twitter journal up of the season, mostly so I can just vent. It helps, especially when everyone around you at the office is freaking out in bad ways.
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