On April 15, (aka Pay Your Taxes and Shut the Hell Up Day), our current town of residence hosted one of those Tea Party rallies in the public square. As one would expect, it was chock-full of folks exercising their right as citizens to congregate and espouse those views that they hold dearest.
Those views, of course, happen to be as follows:
1. White people are good. Everyone else, not so much. Especially if you get elected President.
2. Taxes are bad. (Bad!)
3. Government regulation of just about anything is bad. (Really bad! Awful!)
Given the demographic (white, mostly old, surprisingly literate), I figured this was a chance to appeal to their sensibilities as people of similar backgrounds who also cherish time-honored values of freedom of speech and civil debate. To wit:
1. "Down with government regulation! Close the library! Turn off the traffic signals! Stop signs are socialism! Unadulterated free-market banking practice will save us all!"
2. "Pay your taxes or the IRS will get you!"
3. "They're trying to take away our freedom to stand in a public square and witness the last gasps of Reconstruction-era racism and Southern government distrust!"
4. (My personal favorite): "Why are all of you standing around in the middle of the day on a weekday? Go get a job so my tax money doesn't have to support your Medicare and Social Security! Freeloading hippies!"
I was honestly not surprised when I received replies that were not particularly reflective of civil discourse and legitimate debate. Then again, the more I'm here, the more I enjoying stirring up the Necks.
Which brings me to a discussion of not being here, at least as much. The update:
1. I am now Doer of Good 4. This is obviously one step above Doer of Good 3 but not quite Senior Doer of Good. Regardless, I am glad for it, because it counts as a resume builder and helps pay the bills.
2. I am about 98% sure (i.e. it's all done except putting it in writing and marking the calendar) that I'll be doing an initial three-month stint on the easternmost Non-Alcoholic Isthmus Missing Its Mainland Appendage starting mid to late May. This has the same benefits as #1, except... more. Important note: consistent non-stop service from ATL and Miami; two bedroom condo. Just sayin'.
3. The Justice League of America is "currently evaluating candidates." I don't put a lot of stock in this (I can't help but imagine that they get swamped any time they post something), but who knows. A year ago I used to crack jokes about Option #2, and now...
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2 comments:
Two things:
1) I have run out of patience. I know I'm supposed to be open-minded and understanding and tolerant because I'm (sigh) a liberal, but I am also Scotch-Irish from North Alabama, and I have had enough. Therefore: any person who does not acknowledge the native birth and citizenship of the President of the United States is officially unfit for polite society and should be dealt with accordingly, up to and including the Atticus Finch.
2) You should be aware that we will be attending my 20th class reunion at Redneck Hogwarts, and it is open to all classes. I'm just sayin'...
You realize that in my world, "updated options" has a totally different meaning? It also was more likely to be heard during the dot-com bust when most people's stock options had gone belly up...
Congrats on the promo and the salary increase. You're our rich relatives now. And congrats on gaining more island time. I'm trying to figure out how we can join you on the island, but Stagger Lee's work environment doesn't lend itself to telecommuting the same way mine does. Alas. We're working on options.
Speaking of tea baggers, I'm having to avoid the koob-f again. I have severe issues with self-proclaimed (and usually loud) "Christians" acting decidedly UNChristian. The less I go down the road, the more I preserve my sanity.
Do you guys want anything from Europe? We leave in late May... assuming the volcano stops erupting.
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